Awhile back, I heard a quote that stopped me in my tracks. Jim Rohn, America’s foremost business coach who recently passed away, said:
“We must all suffer one of two things: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret.”
While the truth of this quote sunk in, I had to admit there were plenty of things I had regret over because I never disciplined myself to change my result.
As I’ve shared this philosophy with others, I find that most of the time we put off the discipline because that has to come now while the regret can come much later.
Take our physical health for example. Getting off the couch or denying ourselves dessert happens (or doesn’t happen) in the present moment. The regret may come much later when we are diagnosed with diabetes, high blood pressure or develop a chronic pain in our knee.
The amazing thing is, statistics show that when faced with a dire consequence to our health only 5-10% of people will make a radical, sustainable change. You’ve probably heard of people diagnosed with lung cancer who wouldn’t give up smoking. This happens more than we can imagine.
But where else does this phenomenon occur? Where else in life do we put off the discipline until we are paying dearly?
Relationships – Many couples ignore the problems in their relationships until there is nothing left to salvage. It seems ludicrous that people would rather pay thousands to a divorce attorney than hundreds to a marriage counselor. But that is the point. To go to counseling now requires time, energy and sacrifice and most people just don’t want to make the effort. If you’ve been unfortunate enough to witness or go through a divorce, you see the regret firsthand.
Business – Typically 75% of all new businesses fail within the first year. After a year like the last, I suspect that number was even higher. So what happens in that first year of business that makes it so difficult to survive? In my experience, most business owners are not willing to pick up the phone to call for the sales or help they need. Whether it’s pride (I should be able to figure this out myself) or fear (They will reject me), before long the bills are unpaid and the doors have to close. The pain of discipline at marketing and prospecting is replaced with the pain of regret at losing a business.
Money & Finances – Over the last year, we’ve learned more about our neighbors spending habits than we may have ever wanted to know. About 43% of American families spend more than they earn each year, the average household carries more than $8000 in credit card debt and very few have savings or retirement accounts. This can only occur when short-term thinking outweighs long-term thinking. The very use of a credit card implies that we want it now – but we’ll pay for it later. Money is the number one thing couples fight about. Yet the discipline of managing their money seems more painful to them than the hiding, arguing, and ultimate regret when the money runs out or there isn’t money to do the things they really want to do.
So what is the solution? We live in an instant gratification society and we want what we want right now. So how do we shift to being more proactive before the pain sets in?
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